i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
