so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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