your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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