i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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