He told me they were just razor bumps!
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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