Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I can't turn off my feet"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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