i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I want a musical about memes.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
