you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
