At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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