One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Help. Why am I so naked?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
