You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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