he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
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The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
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Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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