I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
our cab driver is having phone sex.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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