no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
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Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
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This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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