Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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