Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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