why im i the only drunk person in the library?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize
