that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
