Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Randomize
