The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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