His pubic hair was longer than his dick
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
