i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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