you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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