Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
The beers last night were like the tears from god
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Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
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You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I don't want my vagina anymore.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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