im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
