get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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