On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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