I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
