I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
