Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
