I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize