Just fell off a train. Bad.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I still have a little drunk in my system
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
