I cockslap morals
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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