I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm like, not good at living.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
