all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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