meet me or not, i'm out of control
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize