tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
