Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize