He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
