I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
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My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
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I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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