Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
PANTIES FOUND
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