Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
dude. I can hear the air.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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