Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
