A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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