that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
