I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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