My room smells like vodka and shame
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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