Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She bit a glass in half.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
