So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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