nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Randomize
